Last week I blogged about being excited that we were going to start having “surprise” money. Touching on the different ways we can show love to others. Gary Chapman wrote an amazing book called, “The 5 Love Languages” and I wanted to hit a few highlights for how this book can have potential to change relationships.
By the title there are 5 different love languages,
- Words of Affirmation
- Quality Time
- Receiving Gifts
- Acts of Service
- Physical Touch
Most people will give love in the way they prefer to receive it. For myself quality time is a top of the list and thankfully God saw fit to give me someone who spoke the same language. My in-laws are examples of what high priority on receiving gifts looks like, with a card for every occasion and a little something here and there just to show they care. While the book is aimed towards couples it can give a good lesson for how to treat family and friends as well.
Even the parents!
Throughout highschool my mom and I would end up arguing. Reading this book was a revelation during that time period. As previously stated my language was time but hers as I came to find out was acts of service. Those two don’t get along well if you don’t know about them.
I would not bother to clean the kitchen and she would cancel our trips to the mall or something along those lines. Caused for huge arguments. Won’t forget the day I took extra time and cleaned the kitchen really nice and she cried when she came home from work.
Learning about the other person…
It doesn’t take long when you watch your spouse, significant other, parents, kids, and even friends to see what language that they speak and prefer to be spoken to is. The simple goal is take find out and then act in it. Obviously it can be more difficult in practice, but in the end it is rewarding when both parties end up feeling cared about.
Have you read the 5 Love Languages? Has it impacted any of your relationships? Just from reading above can you identify your primary language and will that change the way you act towards spouse or family?